Sunday, January 20, 2008

Welcome to Baking 101

Hey Guys it's David
So yesterday (saturday) I decided that since this whole week I've been able to eat nothin' but soup and water, I was gonna make a pizza! Then Tisha says to me "Hey lets make bread too!" Sounds like a great Idea to me...little did I know that our worlds were going to be turned upside down! I start making the pizza sauce, and putting together the topping, I decided that buffalo chicken pizza with mushrooms and olives would hit the spot. Tisha started making the bread dough. Soon (well about an hour later) everything is ready, Tisha throws in a loaf, and it commences it's baking. The pizza dough gets rolled out and when it's sufficiently sauced, we deploy the cheese (we used pepperjack -oh man it's spicy! But sooooo good!), then a layer: thinly sliced ham, a few crumbles of bacon, then the shredded chicken that has been basted in buffalo sauce, then the mushrooms (the olives got put in the sauce, so they're under the cheese)....then topped it all off with a sprinkling of oregano...it looked perfect! BING! bread's done! Tisha takes it out and sets in on the back burner to cool...I throw the pizza in, then I notice that smoke is coming from the bread...I look at the stove...The burner had been on the whole time! SO we take it from the burner flip it out of the form to reveal a nicely blackened bottom
...kinda like the time I threw $80 out the window when i was a kid ;OP...Needless to say Tisha was less than exuberant. I thought quickly then pulled out our trusty electric carver and thought to myself "off with the bread!...the burnt part I mean." SO we cut it off and it was delicious...no one would be the wiser...unless the caught wind of what was about to happen next to our happy luncheon...I heard the the distinctness of a "BING" coming from the kitchen...oh goody! the pizza is finished...we open the oven, we pull out the pizza, and...It looks beautiful! I could have cried it was so perfect looking, the flying pie had nothing on me. We set the table, preparing to eat this culinary masterpiece, With pizza cutter in hand I began to roll with the precision of a jet fighter, one pass, 2 pass, 3 perfect passes, no crooked pieces on my watch, no way man! 4th pass completed and we had ourselves a nice lookin' pizza. We pull out the spatula and begin to serve...wait! what's this! I can't put the spatula under the pizza! It's like some cosmic force is pulling the pizza to the pizza stone with terrifying strength! It's then that I realize...we forgot to grease the stone! ARGH! Foiled again! So we spent the better part of that meal trying to cut it off of the pizza stone...but i gotta say...best mangled pizza I have ever eaten...Bar none

7 comments:

April said...

must be preoccupied with other things I'd say-

and it doesn't surpise me Tisha wanted bread..Tisha??? put the bread down. Just say no.

Tara said...

Wow, sounds like you two had a long time in the kitchen today! Niels made a creation entitled "the thing" with lots of stuff in the crockpot with chicken. It ended up being good and I had to eat my words (and apologize) for the not so nice things I said as he was throwing ingredients into the crockpot.

Tami said...

I hope this experience doesn't spoil future ones! Good luck cooking in the kitchen. We all have our moments... just look like you both had them at the same time :)

Marne said...

Nice story....I like the blog!

MMMmmm...I love fresh bread...

Braydan and Jessica said...

I agree with April :)

Chay said...

One word: Bummer.

Tiffani said...

David - I'm waiting for your next short story! How were your first couple days of school? I'm also anxious to hear of subbing stories! Tisha, how are you? tiff